Episode 41 - Keeping in balance

I ran into a friend today who regularly reads my blog.  "You haven't written anything lately.  I check, but there's nothing."

"I know" I said, "Episodes write themselves in my head, but I can't put them on paper... " (not that I have EVER put one on paper...)  It's true. I haven't blogged in two weeks and not for lack of material,  Things are pretty much the same as they have been the past seven months... at least Grandma is the same.  I may be a little more stressed but that's what comes from recovering from surgery, living with an octogenarian, a teenager and being on a diet.  Yeah... a diet.

After a family wedding last summer (which DH and I had both dropped weight for) I gained 10 pounds back; after Grandma moved in, I gained 10 more.  Part of the weight gain could be due to our making better meals (for Grandma's benefit) and the other part could be attributed to self induced culinary comfort.  Excuses aside - DH and I both decided it was time to lose some weight - so we started eating lo-carb.  DH had been quite successful on lo-carb in the past and though we've tried other diets, I agreed to do it "his way" this time.  More about the diet in another episode, I only mention it now to substantiate my stress factor. 

Grandma should always use a cane.  She has two, one she keeps in her basement apartment at the foot of the stairs, and the other she keeps by the doorway (to the basement) in the kitchen.  We encourage her to use one all the time... but that's no guarantee she will. 

Last week, the school nurse called to tell me CeCe was ill.  I went to the school to get her, to take home. As we drove into the driveway, we spotted Grandma (with her cane) walking closely with another woman.

CeCe: There's Grandma.

Me: Is that Ruby?

CeCe:  No... someone else.

I drop CeCe by the back door and drive up to Grandma, lowering my window.

Me:  Hey - Whatsup?  (Grandma turns to look at me)

G:  I'm helping her home.

I recognize the other woman as a friend of Grandma's who is visiting her family (our neighbors).  They are now embarking on the slightly sloping parkway toward the street.

Me:  Are you sharing that cane?

Her friend replies:  I need help but she can't cross the street.

G:  I know I'm not to cross the street... I'm just helping her down to it.

 I look up to our front porch.  Ruby is standing there.  She looks at me, shaking her head.  What do you do?  Grandma is going to test her boundaries to the limit.

The very next day, while outside, Grandma fell in the yard.  Ruby arrived minutes later to find her and called me at work.  I rushed home.  Grandma was sitting upright and refusing our assistance to get up. 

Me: So do you want me to call Coonrod? (a local "Wrecker/Crane" service... Ruby laughed)

G:  Who?

Me: Never mind.

G:  Bring me a pillow.

Me: Why?

G:  I want to use it to get myself up.

 I had already reasoned (or tried) with her so let Ruby retrieve a bed pillow from the house.  Grandma motioned to the ground beside her.

 G: Put it there.  (Ruby complies)

We then watched Grandma lay back and roll herself over onto the pillow and then over again to the previous sitting position.

Me: Mom, you're exactly where you were... except over here.  What are you trying to do?

G:  Put that pillow on the other side.  I need to use my good knee.  (Ruby moves the pillow)

Again, we watch Grandma roll herself over onto the pillow, this time planting her 'good' knee into the ground and hoisting herself up onto her hands and knees.  At that point, she allowed Ruby and me to help her to a standing position.  Her glad realization that nothing appeared broken was second only to her gloating over her effective method of getting herself up.

I took her to the clinic where she was checked out and x-rayed.  Ice was prescribed and her complaint of pain moved each day from her knee, to her ankle to her arm and currently resides in her shoulder.  Bruises and subsequent pain can occur days after an injury I tell her.  Oh - and what, do you ask was she doing out in the yard for anyway?  "To tuck the dog line in so no crippled person comes along and trips on it" (other than herself).

I often go into work early on Fridays and such was the case a few days ago.  I left the house before Grandma got up for the day so it was no surprise to get her call an hour or so into my work day.

Me:  Hello?

G:  There you are.  I came down this morning and the window was open… the fan was on… the deck door was open…

Me:  I came to work early.  CeCe walked to school.  You can shut them if it gets cold.

G:  It’s ALREADY cold.

Me: Then shut them.

Ring:

Me: Hello?

G:  I'm calling because there’s a light on under the dryer.

Me: Someone left the door open, that's why the lights on.

G:  What should we do?

Me: Close the door.'

G:  OK I’ll do that right now.

Ring:

Me:  Hello?

G: The garage door is open. Is it supposed to be open?

Me: No – CeCe probably went out that way.  You can close it.

G:  How do you close it?

Me: Push the button… and turn off the light if it’s on.

G:  Where is the light switch?

Me: There's one in the garage and one inside the laundry room

G:  Where’s the garage button… oh there it is… which one do I push – there’s two.

Me: One is for the light in the garage (great, another light) The bigger one closes the door

G:  I see one that says Lock.

Me: Never mind… leave the door open.

G:  Oh – there it goes (I hear the door closing)

Me:  OK – bye.

The following day, outside the house - in the presence of four adult witnesses and two toddlers, Grandma rose up out of her white plastic lawn chair. She lost her footing and teetered to her left.  The chair tipped over and Grandma began a 360 while we all watched on in horror.  With arms outstretched to her sides, like a child playing airplane... she staggered around in slow motion until finally coming to a complete stop, once again facing forward and as "upright" as she can be.  We broke into applause.

And yes - these four events happened in a five day period.  It's a good thing I work close to home (and also a good thing I don't work "from home").  I realize blogging is therapeutic and I should probably do more blogging and less consumption of comfort food.  We should also wrap Grandma in Nerf to protect her from herself!

So ends Episode 41